A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
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